Waldorf Astoria Hotel, New York, March 2011

Back in my childhood room for few days. Not much has changed, neither in me or to it. Rather, a lot has changed but is still the same.

I had to watch some of my old movies because I had to, for a thing. Was like seeing someone I used to know well but lost touch with.
A stranger, but not strange enough to pass judgement on, strangely familiar. Like a family member you’re not fond of but are conditioned to be kind to. That kid there, I have always held a grudge against.

it’s hard to be mostly unrelatable.

>

Since I got back, I do little else than spray myself with Cuir Mauresque and listen to this. to this. to this. to this. to this.

#stray

My crotch is busting at the seams and it’s not the old balls being bombastic.

new H&M pants, pff..

home.

this diary belongs to someone whom I no longer am in contact with.

violently lonely.

from a recent Down Town magazine shoot.

3,000 blackbirds fell from the sky in central Arkansas. Scientists there say celebratory fireworks on New Year’s Eve likely sent the birds into such a tizzy that they crashed into homes, cars and each other before plummeting to their deaths.

the difference between cost and worth.

If this decrepit old man attempts to start a conversation with me, I’ll pretend I’m Swedish.

[via iPhone]

“And Eve Was Weak”
Betty Buckley+Linzi Hateley
Carrie The Musical
Broadway 1988

comfort of strangers / discomfort of familiars

“..Ευτυχώς δεν θα σε αφήσουν ήσυχο.”
yes, they will.

Out in the veranda for a smoke, scent of flowers in the night air, birds chirping, boxers on, but it’s December.
I give up, might as well enjoy this.

won’t deny, that given the luxury, I’d NEVER leave my house.

Afternoons like today, when I was a child, I’d lay all my craft supplies out on the floor and spend hours without pee or food breaks, making things. I just smelled some clay and it reminded me of this.

dammit.
one of the greatest absurdist artists in history, has passed away.
Shaye Saint John died.
poor darling.

check out her videos, before they’re gone.
they tend to disappear.

to understand her, one must really study her closely.
if you can see behind the obvious mess,
you’ll understand what Shaye Saint John is.

two of my most favorites

“OMG OO-LALA”

“DRIP DROP DIET”

I’d taken it for granted that she’d be here forever.
she was my hero.